Wednesday, June 3, 2015

"I Wouldn't Like Me, If I Met Me"

It's SPRING!! The weather is getting warmer, the grass is greener, sun is shining. Life is good!

Except THIS: my spring/summer clothes have been brought out.


x 1000 at least maybe much more oh my goodness what have I done shouldn't have had that cookie or that cheesecake or that hamburger or that ice cream yes it was the ice cream too much ice cream must go on a diet nobody will like me did that cashier the other day look at me like I was fat I think she did and maybe whispered to her friend that's why class numbers are down that's why my work isn't done I'm weak and stupid and a failure why did I let myself do this nobody will like me I'm not good enough I should hide away and eat ice cream why not ice cream my life is already over.

Don't judge. Only in my panicked inner world do I blatantly ignore proper grammar and punctuation.

I don't feel bigger. I look in the mirror and objectively don't think I look any bigger. I'm guessing if I got on a scale it would read around what I would guess. Note*** I haven't stood on a scale in 9 years. I'm not terrified to, but I am aware that it would affect my mood to see the numbers move around, and truthfully? I'm kinda way over defining myself by a number.

Unless it's number of push ups I can do, a running personal best or bra size. Those number I can get behind.

So how on earth have I gone from a size 4 shorts fitting beautifully to now not making it north of the top of my knee??

Physics, chemistry and shoe horns all say that such a change is improbable at best.

And yet.... the fact remains that I have no shorts to wear. And my tank tops are all crop tops (which according to InStyle is the fashion this year - so score one for my expanding self).

I kinda thought I was alone in my misery, that I was the only one who had packed on a jazillion lbs of short ribs and fries this winter. It turns out that I am not alone. Many of my active clients/friends have complained of a similar phenomenon.

Since the last time I broke out my spring clothes I have increased my running mileage, and strength training routine to support this. I have averaged over 100 miles every month from April 2014 to April 2015. I have changed up my weight lifting routine to complement this new regime, plus changed my diet somewhat to include more protein sources and less simple carbohydrates.

That right there is a recipe for change. When you change things - do less, do more, do differently, your amazing body adapts to suit those changes. That, in a nutshell, is what fitness is. Your body's ability to adapt to change.

So as my incredibly slender, beautiful and fit friend said today,
" We all need to stop blaming ourselves when something about our body changes and blame clothing companies for not making clothes that fit women who can do amazing things"

Well. Who can argue with that?

Find Your CORE

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