I did finish. I surpassed my realistic time expectations and matched my goal time. I may have even enjoyed it. I loved the excitement and the planning leading up to the race. The atmosphere on race day. The joy of it all.
Runner's have mantras, songs and random thoughts that go in loops in our heads when we run. I'm going to give you a km by km playback of my interval conversation on Mississauga Marathon day, 2015.
Start: This is amazing. So excited!! Lets get this party started, RIGHT??
1km: ALL.THE.PEOPLE. All running. All excited. All hopeful and full of promise. Incredible.
2km: Oops.Running over a minute faster actually than planned. Chill out Annie
3km: My.Legs.Feel.Amazing.
4km: Discussing carved out woodland creatures with my running partner in crime. How precious!
5km: This marathon shit is easy. I got this. Pfffft. I could run all day.
6km: Still a little faster than planned. Oh well,I'm comfortable....ooohhhh - woodland creature!
7km: Singing random song lyrics.
8km: Nailing water station run by's. Taught running partner in crime to properly create a funnel with one's dixie cup
9km: Shooting down some fuel. Sport Bean Jelly Bellies - get in and keep this machine going!
10km: Ahead of schedule. 1 set of 10km down. 3 more to go.
11km: Chronically achey knee and hip disagree when I remind them there's still 3+ hours to go
12km: This is the most beautiful running route. I feel so lucky to be here! I feel so alive!
13km: Hi random spectator!! You are right - I CAN do this!! I appreciate your confidence.
14km: I love these water station lovelies - they even know my name. I'm a celebrity!
15km: I have to pee.
16km: Hydration vs Need to Pee. Hydration wins. Pee is insignificant. Only wimps pee.
17km: Still ahead of planned time. Dammit pee.
18km: Love all the spectators - so amazing to have their energy boost!
19km: Oh, here's the hill they were talking about.
20km: Most people I know are still in PJ's eating bacon. Suckers....they are missing out. On LIFE!!!
21km: Halfway there - halfway there - halfway there. All we have to do is that..all over again.
22km: Water. Gatorade. Water on head. Gatorade in mouth. Life is good.
23km: I'm a little tired. And achey. Pre-emptive fueling with strange squishy gummies.
24km: Why not me? Why not me? Why not me? I've got this. But I'm tired.
25km: Goodbye running partner in crime. Slow down a bit I must. Go and win this thing, for me!
26km: Hmmm. It's awfully quiet now.
27km: I cannot run any more. My legs have eroded and my will to live is waning.
28km: 4k and I'm going to hubby with my KIDS!! I LOVE MY KIDS!! I WILL RUN TO MY KIDS!
29km: Pee.
30km: 12km to go - a morning run. I can do this. Right. Why not me? Pee.
31km: Two nice gentlemen are talking to me about hamburgers. They seem happy. I hate them.
32km: My kids. At the top of a hill. Hugs, high fives & cold water!I don't want to leave them.Ever. Hold me.
33km: Pee. Did I just? Nah. Couldn't be. Kegels, Annie, Kegels
34km: Every step hereafter is the farthest I have ever run. No big deal. or BIG HUGE CRAZY DEAL!!
35km: I thought they said this was a downhill course.
36km: Every song lyric to Spice Girls Wannabe + the "F" word. Delirium + tragedy
37km: *ASDHAFKHBFUYOEU@*$&(@#$*&^&( BWDBASDASDAJNFAFJJKHG#r8Y(Q*&@)&$#)$*(#$UJFFEANLJSKDASDKAS:DLK
38km: Who da f*#k tied cement to my feet - and give me every GU you have or I'll slap you. Effing volunteers - why don't YOU know my name?
39km: I can't get water near my mouth. And why don't I have to pee anymore?
40km: Get off yer arse, you lazy spectator. If you are so great - you should run. FOR ME!! I'll hold yer seat.
41km: 2km to go. One foot in front of the other. Poor fellow is injured. I'll encourage him and help him get home. You can do this random stranger! I'm a hero. Should get a medal!
41.5km: Sorry lame-o - the end is near. I'm off to the finish - good luck gimping in! Oooooh - I heard them call my run partner in crime's name!! So cool! Plus - the end must be near. The end!
41.6km: Why is the finish line getting so far away? StopmovingitstopitIbegyou
41.7km: There's nice, friendly looking people calling my name. I think I know them.
41.8km: One foot forwards. Next foot. Keep going.
41.9km: ALL THE WAY
42.0km: I think I crossed a line. Some eager young man wants me to lift my leg to cut off the timing chip. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Sure thing kid - next week. Ahhh - I DID get a medal for being so nice to gimpy! And - a SPACE BLANKET!! I'm going to wear a tinfoil cape! I'm a real athlete. Wait - is that Chariots of Fire they are playing for me?? Ahhhhhh.
The aftermath: For a girl that can propel herself forward for 4hrs +, standing, picking things off the floor and basically every single simple task became laughably impossible.
Beer happened. Gummy worms and chocolate also. Hugs and celebrations happened.
You cannot commit the time and effort to one single thing and not be changed by it in some way. I can't help but look at myself a little differently. Stronger. More capable. A body worth nourishing well and looking after.
After all that line was not just the end of one run. It was the beginning of another. even greater adventure to come.
Find Your CORE
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