So I am injured. I'll spare you all the details but basically I have some bum hips that don't really want me to be happy. These hips?? They lie.
My doctor suggested I take up swimming. I suggested that he take a second look at with whom he was speaking.
"You talking to me??" I might have even given him some side eye.
So, I get to have an MRI, a bone density scan and another appointment with my surgeon. I am certain I am his favourite patient. If not, well, I should be. I'll work on that when I see him.
So last week I was feeling lost. This week....broken. In know. All. About.Annie. You got it! You clicked on the link - now suffer through - I almost always have a good point to make.
I feel a little like Humpty Dumpty, truth be told, and not just because I MAY have been eating some *cough* ALL of my emotions.
This humpty has had a bit of a fall.
Truth be told, my hips aren't the only part of me eroding. I'm emotional - the girl who didn't cry for 3 something years has opened the floodgates. I recently lay on my kitchen floor with my cheek pressed against the cold floor, staring at the mocking bits of missed breakfast under our table. And I didn't clean it. Even my OCD is out for the season. (Full disclosure. First thing I did when I was feeling better and upright?? Scrubbed that floor. But I digress.)
I stand at the bottome of the stairs staring at the second floor and wonder how I am going to get to the top. Because it seems that insurmountable some days.
Work is stressful. Family is stressful. Life is particularly stressful and often upsetting of late. And we all know that stress takes a toll.
I don't want sympathy. I want you to know that I understand.
That everyone falls apart sometimes.
Even the positive, on top of the world, people loving, inspirational, full of joy, seeker of all things good. Sometimes the tough outer layer of life experience erodes and fades away and lets in the negative. Sometime so much negative gets through that it scars.
I know that each and every one of us has and will fall apart. That the hard knocks of life will scar us, but the sun will, indeed, come out tomorrow. (yes - I went there - and you liked it, admit it)
Healing a wound takes time. Patience. Self love. Love from others. Caring. Tenderness. Slow, gentle recovery. Sometimes help from a knowledgeable professional. And acknowledgement. You have to admit that you are, in fact, a little broken. And that's okay.
Because even Macgyver knows, some duct tape and a one hour story arc can heal almost anything. And so can you.
Find Your CORE