Thursday, June 16, 2011
Hello, Sweet Pea!!
Now, I haven't blogged in a while. I expected to be full of words to share after my succesful 8K run. None came (I know - a rare miracle, for sure!) I couldn't find any inspiration to share with you all. Not even a funny story, or quirky tale to pass along. Truth is, I've been in a little bit of a funk. Post run, I felt exhilarated and proud, and then nothing. My last week has run something like this: Daughter with reaction to bug bite. Son away for four days, and I felt a little like I had lost a part of me. Husband is working unpredictable and long hours. Some sadness and tension in my workplace. Uncertainty about the future. Saying goodbye to people as many of my classes wrap up for the summer. The fear of the financial drain during these lean summer months. No sleep. The feeling of my knee swelling up while teaching a class, and worrying that this injury would impact my ability to meet my own fitness goals, and to continue helping other people to achieve theirs. And I have given up Diet Coke. Almost two days now. I have felt grumpy, irritable, sad, hopeless and (I may have already mentioned this) GRUMPY!! I have just felt completely out of sorts.
This afternoon I decided that I would do some yard work and discovered that underneath my overlong lawn, that there was a veritable jungle of weeds. The baskets that I worked so hard on are dying a slow death, despite the fact that they look so gorgeous from inside my house. Every living thing in my yard was crying for attention. Did I mention we are having a big party in 6 weeks?? The lawn looks like a replica of the Sahara Desert, except the desert is more green and lush. In pure frustration, I sat down in the middle of my backyard and spent some time screaming silently inside. Where were all the beautiful flowers whose seeds I planted last month?? Where? I cried, in silent anguish, where?? Why me?? (yes I am sometimes THAT dramatic) So I plugged in my lawn mower and went at the depressing task of trimming this wasteland of plant life. I bent down to pull out a weed and realized that it was actually a real plant. One of the seeds I had planted. And then I noticed another. And another. Sweet Peas!! Some perspective was to be had here. A challenging week - yes. Reasons to feel less than perfect - sure. Tragic and life changing - nope. Through all the tangle and trauma that is the environment known as my backyard, some beauty has managed to grow, miraculously. So am I all better now - did the sweet pea change my entire outlook on my poopy week? Not at all. But it did give me something beautiful to look forward to.